Nov. 4, 2014

I guess I was inspired by last night’s writing exercise. I notice that neither of them were from a male perspective… thought I would give it a try.

“She told him that she loved him.”

She told him that she loved only him.

I heard it clear as day and it broke my heart.

He was my best friend I and wanted him to be happy, but she was the most beautiful creature I’ve ever seen.

The was she lights up a room with her smile, the way her laugh can bring your out of a deep sadness, the way the touch of her hand lights a fire within.

I was totally and deeply in love with her.

I hated that she loved him.

Every morning I wake up and she is the first thought in my mind, and the last reflection before I close my eyes every night. She even infiltrated my dreams.

She sings when she’s happy. I don’t think she knows I hear her, but when things are going her way and she’s in a good mood, she sings with the radio. Sometimes when the moment hits her, she even dances a little.

I’ve caught myself watching her, being captured by her every movement.

I am in love with her.

But she said she loved only him.

I guess I’m happy for him.

He’s a great guy. I’ve known him for years and years. We were like brothers all through high school. Same classes, football team together, drivers’ ed. class. We even double dated.

So, I guess I’m happy for him.

I can understand why she’s into him, he’s funny and smart and I guess he’s good lookin’; tall and pretty well built. He’s a charmer, could talk just about anyone into doing just about anything.

It’s just that, I’m all those things too.

Why him and not me?

She told me something too once… that she thought I was great, really sweet. That she really valued my friendship.

At the time, I was pretty stoked. I thought I had a chance, but then it dawned on my. I was a friend, and would never be anything more.

So now, I have to watch the girl I’m in love with hold hands and be with my best friends.

I can’t be mad, or upset, of pissed off, or at least I can’t show it.

I’ll always be there listen to how much in love they are, always there to see the kisses and the hugging and the excitement in their eyes when they talk about all the fun they’re having. And I’ll be supportive, I’ll nod and I’ll smile and I’ll pretend that my hear isn’t breaking and that my behind my smile I’m not crying inside.

I’ll be empty, I’m empty now.

I’m empty because she loves only him.

Maybe we can all relate to this writing exercise from one point of view or another.

I'm thinking this might be my favorite exercise yet.

Hope you enjoyed.

Cheers