Happy October 1st, 2014

I was given a free “X” the other night, and I suppose I can use it whenever I want. Tonight for instance, it’s late, I didn’t get a chance to write earlier in the day and now I’m totally pooped out. But I think I’ll keep it in my pocket for a rainy day.

How did I earn the free pass, you may ask. The other night, Monday night, our writing class had a field trip to a movie premier. We had a great time and enjoyed the film in varying degrees. The after party was pretty darn special. The decorations mirrored the film. Because the film took place in a mental hospital, the décor included a hospital bed, nurse’s uniform, several pill bottles with goodness-knows-what inside and of course, syringes. Long story short, I was … dared … to remove one of the more dangerous looking props and if I did, I would get a free pass on writing for a day.

Anyone who has ever met me knows I don’t back away from a bet or a dare (as long as it’s safe and relatively legal) – needless to say, I arrived back at our little group and produced a syringe, complete with the 3” long needle still attached. Fear not, after the appropriate acknowledgement, I returned the would-be, could-be, weapon to it’s rightful spot.

Another member of our tiny-but-mighty entourage had her eye on another decorative prop inspired by the movie.  We considered liberating the little fella and she vowed to do it before the end of the night.

I left before I could confirm or deny anything.

But here’s what I suspect might have happened.

Note – the names may or may not have been changed to protect the innocent… and the potentially guilty.

In a large room filled with well dressed individuals, a party is winding down. The city’s royalty and art-loving upper-class schmooze with visiting entertainment VIPs.  Milling about, looking for excitement are a gaggle of youths, eager to meet and greet with whomever they can.

Off in the corner, past the table serving martini glass KD, stand a group of three. They keep mostly to themselves, but are listening, learning, almost ready to be a part of the crowd.

One of the three, however; has other ideas, aspiration, and intentions.

“If we wait until the end, it’ll be too obvious” she states matter-of-factly.

“What was that, honey?” Andrew, her husband, strains to hear her over the chatter in the room.

“The elephant.” Jade motions surreptitiously to a giant stuffed elephant sitting atop the central display. “I need that elephant!”

Andrew gives a slight nod. He’s in.

Karen, feeling guilty-by-association, begins to fidget and shift her weight from one foot to the other.

As if on cue, Linda, the group’s fourth arrives on scene, having just scored another glass of wine from the free bar.

“Hey guys, the bar’s still serving” she announces with a bright smile.

Her eyes grow wide as she realises that Andrew is in the midst of hatching a plan. “What’s goin’ on?” she asks excitedly.

As sly smiles wipe across Jade and Andrew’s faces, Karen spills the beans… or peanuts, as the case may be. “The elephant’s future is in question.” She gently nods in the direction of the pachyderm, “They plan to free it from this prison and bring it to it’s forever home.”

Jade fleshes out the plan, Andrew contributing with his evil genius as needed. The sheer genius of the scheme washes over Linda and she can barely contain her excitement.

Karen, worried, and with good reason, begins to poke holes in the plan.  Much to her chagrin, this serves only to reinforce the strategy, as opposed to defusing the whole idea.

So it’s agreed, they each have their own part to play in this most wondrous of plots.

The gaggle of youths, unwitting pawn, gathered near the central display, the display with the elephant. As if directed by Karen herself, the youths begin to take selfies and pictures of one-another. They contort their bodies to try to include the elephant, high on his perch, in their photographs.

Cue Karen: “Hey, do you guys want me to take a group shot?”

Excitedly, they youths hand over their cameras and cell phones.

“Why don’t you guys grab the elephant, get him in the shot too” Karen coaxes, and the youths follow through.

Meanwhile, Linda casually walks through the crowd, commenting on the exuberance of youth and what fun they must be having, ever so gently directing the glances of the crowd.

Andrew and Jade gather their coats and bags and arrange them over their arms. They make their way trough the crowd as the gaggle of youths finish up with their photo-shoot. They call for one final goofy shot and they all jump up – click.

The crowd is beginning to thin.

“It’s now or never.” Jade says and grips Andrew’s arm for courage.

Karen is busy handing back cameras and cell phones. The youths scroll through and compare photos.  Linda makes one last round of the room, saying her goodbyes to the people she knows and some she doesn’t, keeping their attention with her.

No one notices Jade swipe the pachyderm and slide him to Andrew, who slips him covertly under the jackets on his arm. They casually make their way out the front door.

Later, in the parking, the four cohorts meet up and delight over their elephant-napping.

Andrew chuckles, “Free Xs for everyone!!! A whole week's worth of Xs!!”

Karen and Linda each let out a giggle.

Jade wonders aloud to no one in particular. “I’ll bet Sheila will be pissed she only got one X.”

The laughter increases.

Somewhere, far across the city, I suddenly awake from my sleep. “Nooo!”

And there you have it.

Hope you enjoy the read… and your ill-gotten Xs.  ;)

Cheers

(Also – thanks again for a great evening!)